Honestly, the way I look at it, I can justify in my mind buying a Ford SuperDuty truck if I only go three months without being a driver and not owning a car. After all, don’t you know urbanists love the life without a vehicle, and I’ve always heard the praises of life without a car – you save so much money, you loose so much weight, and you are so healthier both physically and mentally. At least if you are middle class, I am not sure if the ghetto people who can’t afford to drive or the severely disabled would agree.
There is something to brag about in middle class liberal circles to say you don’t own a car and you ride your bike and take the city bus to work. I should sign up for one of those ride-share clubs, that let you rent the CDTA Electric car by the hour for a few bucks, because that is an essential part of life in the liberal car-free urbanist circles. I also should find a good bar to hang out in, after all I don’t have to worry about getting a DUI, not that I ever really drove home from bars, because what fun is going out to an open bar reception if you have to drive. And no roadside cops waiting to insert their penises in your mouth for going through the yellow light. I’ve also been saying now is the time to take advantage of the free museum passes the library loans, and visit some of the museums on weekends, because I don’t have a vehicle to drive out on frigid cold winter days and look at ramshakle goat farms on the ice-encrusted dirt roads when I’m bored out of my mind in the winter. You know good liberal things.
As I need justification of my liberal credentials because let’s be honest, a regular-cab long-bed Ford SuperDuty 4×4 truck only looks in it’s place with TRUMP or ALBERTA PROUD bumper sticker on it’s bumper. Conservatives drive SuperDuty trucks, shit shovelers, hog farmers and oil men. Not that the SuperDuty’s with the 6.8L are that bad on gas, I tell myself, at least in the real world if I’m not spending my days driving around the city or sitting traffic but are out on the back roads of Bum Fuck Egypt. I don’t drive to the Maul very often, it’s not going to be daily driver, like so many of the suburbanite do as they crowd the Arterial Highways at rush hour, on their way from the cinder-block office building to the shop mauling to their plastic house in suburbs. I’ll be camping and traveling, and if I have to pay a few extra bucks for the truck I actually want, it beats owning a Honda Crapper in which I couldn’t be bothered to change the oil as I would hate my life so much driving between the plastic house and the acres of parking.
While I did the sleeping in an unheated truck bed for many years now, my toes do not like the cold anymore. I've been wondering what the best way to pipe the heat in from a diesel heater when I get my next rig and truck cap. This seems like a good solution.
Truth is I celebrated New Years Eve 2026 and the closing hours of the year with a classic basically Trumpian rant about how I was justified to push him into early retirement, and no I don’t want to spend all my money on a plastic house in suburbs even if it does smell like cow shit and that I should by myself that ginormousFord SuperDuty so I can still see the country before I get elderly and are stuck at home feeding goats and shoveling hog manure.I work hard for my shit, buying in New York sucks, land is too expensive, neighbors too close, can’t legally burn my garbage, gun restrictions and fees. Truth is if you can smell your neighbor’s crap burning or hear his gun fire, he’s too close.Yeap, that fluid flim is going to stink like sheep shit when I coat my SuperDuty but whatever beats the fucking rust bucket I was driving until last evening.
So yeah, on that note, Happy New Year. We made it to 2026, and I didn’t think last year was the worse year ever, the economy was good, my investments done good, I worked hard and improved and developed the systems at Assembly Data Services. Road my bike to work many days, smoked some shit and good weed, burned most of my trash up in the woods, had some great adventures with Big Red until he was done, towards the end I could really feel the frame starting to give way and wobble, especially as I rode along the twists of Tan Hollow, Hillson Road, and Hunt Road out to my parents place in Dormansville as I went for one last little drive with Big Red before the year came to a close. It made it to it’s destination, the frame did not crack but maybe I should have taken the advice of the shop to stay safe, but whatever it was fun. But whatever, that was 2025 and it’s a new year now – and that ol’ Gram Parson record reminds me of those days past riding mountain bike in the rain stoned out of my brain smelling like wood smoke on those logging roads in the Conifer Easement last autumn. Days gone by! A new year, no more Big Red!
Truth is I am going to miss those drives out in the country, but I know the whole situation is kind of temporary, and truth is I don’t drive that much in the winter months, as the roads are shit and city and it’s hard to get to the back country with the snow and ice much of the winter. Life without a car will have it’s inconveniences, especially when it’s mostly the impoverished and seriously disabled who don’t drive, but I’ll figure out how to make it work, especially if it end up with me owning a new ginormous pickup truck, a trip out to the woods of the Upper Peninsula, lots of bonfires and weed up in woods, and maybe some more hunting and foraging this year. Maybe because I’m leaning so much on the 25 lbs of kidney beans and 10 lbs of rice I have at home to make it through my time without owning a truck this winter, I’ll want to eat more meat and plants not wrapped in plastic from the woods this year. Beats buying and burning all that toxic, smelly plastic shit. Or landfilling and maybe storing it until I get a new truck.
Left work at 1 PM yesterday, picked up a few necessary supplies at Walmart, and did a quick wash down of the truck at the car wash, noting how bad the frame has gotten. Unpacked things at home, spend a bit of time sitting behind the wheel of Big Red, getting out most of the things I’ll need for winter at home. I left most of my camping gear in the now retired truck, I will move things over once I get my next truck in April. Then I decided to go for a little drive out and up over Cass Hill and Reidsville, then back over through Tan Hollow. Saw more burn barrels then I expected, kind of put a smile on my face. That one house I briefly studied on Zillow with the weird lot and neighbors too close has sold. Had to think that circa-1800 house I just saw on Zillow in Coeymans must have issues and that’s why the past three sales fell through on it, but also it’s kind of pricey but I do wish now that I could have looked at it lest my truck, but still New York State sucks except for the money, the woods, and the weed. Amazing how priorities change when you reach your mid-40s. Maybe I’m stupid about the truck and the homestead – just buy the 20-year old Honda Civic and plastic house like everybody else in the suburbs – but that shit stinks when you burn it.
Spent the night over with Mom and Dad at this their homestead, celebrating New Years Eve with cheese fondue. 🫕Truth is not having cooked any beans up since I used up the last I had cooked on Monday, so it was good to have some delicious dairy fat and protein. I have so little cheese these days at home as I know it’s junk food but it was good to spend some time together, as I don’t know if this will be our last fondue together as a family. Maybe or maybe not, but much like my truck, time lasts forever until it’s done. I keep going back to how blessed that at least I had a date when I knew Red would be retired. Plus realistically, I know this is the year to travel with my new rig, as I don’t know how long this will be an option in the future.
I was reading at article I shared earlier about that firefighter who was laid off because he refused the COVID vaccine because he couldn’t bare the thought of having a foreign fluid injected into his body, much less his years of ever so secretly scrubbing his uniform, washing his body in the sea, and cleaning his car to keep any harm from the chemicals he was exposed to in fighting fires from being tracked into his home. A life of secret rituals, which people had hints about being a bit odd or unusual.
Some how that struck a nerve on me, with my semi-secret trash burning fires, my pyromania, my aversion to landfills and consumerism more generally. While it’s not what it was when I was in my younger years, I do see it as something I really should confront before the day it’s used against me, intentionally or otherwise. As obsessive-compulsive thoughts are kind of silly, and despite the stern warnings of the NYS Health Department and Environmental Conservation Department, a little bit of plastic in a rednecks burn barrel isn’t biggest crime or threat to our world today. Yes, there are hazardous metals and dioxins, but we live in a world of chemical soups.
Indeed, at this point I’ve become more and more open about my pyromania. As I know it’s kind of an open secret, a joke by people that read the blog. It doesn’t pain me nearly as much to throw things away, especially knowing what a joke recycling is. I produce far less trash then most people, I don’t do all the internet buying of junk, and while I have my vices, namely my big pickup truck, the food and supplies I buy is often in bulk and minimally packaged. And quite burnable. I don’t get upset at parties anymore, avoiding paper plates, and I don’t say anything and try not to be too judgemental about other people when it comes to generating a lot of trash and not properly recycling.
Truth is in many more remote parts of country, people burn all kinds of debris from tires on down to bagged household garbage and plastic. I am not arguing it’s not stinky or produces some noxious compounds, but it’s also quite locally accepted. Most off-grid cabins, remote farms, ranches and homes still burn. It’s just what happens in country, and while I might enjoy a good fire and sometimes burn shit I shouldn’t it’s just that. My week-to-week landfill output is almost zero, as I recycle the few cans I use and also clothing and used shoes. I do stockpile some other non-burnables and metals, one of these day’s I’ll get rid of them, but it’s not a lot.
The key to Obsessive – Compulsive disorder might just be to accept things as they are, and I’ve really tried to do that more now. Indeed, without a vehicle, I won’t be able to have my fires, so I’m going to have to use the trash and recycle now more. It’s fine, and maybe it will change my life for the better. And some day, I will have that off-grid cabin and things will be different and nobody will care what I burn up in the woods.
Rarely does the end of a year coincide with the end of an era in one’s life. Big Red’s retirement is only a few hours away, one last drive, I will put him in park. Despite people asking and emailing me, I have not determined Big Red’s future after over 370 nights camping in him, 120,000 miles driven most of scenic, remote country. And a few trips to Walmart and the transfer station to get rid of tin cans and glass. I washed him, but first before I can sell him, I need to get out all my camping gear, the solar and batteries, relays, switches, radio moved over to the new truck. Will the rims I have the 35s on Red be able to fit on a SuperDuty 8-bolt wheel? Things to investigate!
Some ways closure is good. It’s so rare in life you know when the end is coming to a close. I had planned to retire Big Red in April 2026, but the frame rust moved it up a few months. Too often people don’t know when to quit, don’t toss in the hat when they are at the top of their game. They just stick around, enjoying the high, and keep pushing it way past their prime. 14 plus years is a good run, it’s a similar period to which I plan to toss my hat in a work from now. Not because I have to but because I can, and I want to leave at the top, rather then the bottom of my game, still have time to do the things yet done in life.
There will be life after Red. I am looking forward to the adventure and experience of living in the suburbs without a car for now, though there is still somewhat passable bus service around to get me to work and to the grocery store as necessary. And I have my mountain bike, which I will continue to ride to work as much as possible, to the grocery store, etc. Laundry and trash will be more difficult but I figure out solutions. In many ways it would have been better if I could have pushed Big Red into the new year, but it’s been a good ride regardless. And maybe stuck in city except for bike rides to fringes of suburbs, will be a time to find a bit more sanity.
In many ways, I am excited about the year to come in 2026. I doing a lot of neat stuff in the office, building capacity that at times feels like building a superhighway to a vacant lot but one that will help prepare my agency for the future. The car-free lifestyle this winter will be an experience, but I think the best is yet to come. For one, I am not permanently considering going car free, hell I’m looking at buying Ford SuperDuty Truck, though not one of the crazy big club cab, long ones. Get small, slow gasser model. Honest. I will get another cap, additional solar and batteries, and diesel heater for come next winter. And all this money I’m pouring into the new rig will go towards making a trip to the Upper Peninsula of Michigan, and maybe in November I’ll head back to West Virginia for a week or two. There is a lot to look forward in my life, even if first I got to go through the 20 lbs of pinto beans I’ve stockpiled in pantry, and 10 lbs of brown rice. At least I won’t go hungry in short term without at ruck.
I was sitting in the cab, taking a deep breath, saying this is really over. It’s been quite the ride BigRed!
We made it to 2026, and I didn’t think last year was the worse year ever, the economy was good, my investments done good, I worked hard and improved and developed the systems at Assembly Data Services. Road my bike to work many days, smoked some shit and good weed, burned most of my trash up in the woods, had some great adventures with Big Red until he was done, towards the end I could really feel the frame starting to give way and wobble, especially as I rode along the twists of Tan Hollow, Hillson Road, and Hunt Road out to my parents place in Dormansville as I went for one last little drive with Big Red before the year came to a close. It made it to it’s destination, the frame did not crack but maybe I should have taken the advice of the shop to stay safe, but whatever it was fun. But whatever, that was 2025 and it’s a new year now – and that ol’ Gram Parson record reminds me of those days past riding mountain bike in the rain stoned out of my brain smelling like wood smoke on those logging roads in the Conifer Easement last autumn. Days gone by! A new year, no more Big Red!
but I know the whole situation is kind of temporary, and truth is I don’t drive that much in the winter months, as the roads are shit and city 
and it’s hard to get to the back country with the snow and ice much of the winter. Life without a car will have it’s inconveniences, especially when it’s mostly the impoverished and seriously disabled who don’t drive, 
but I’ll figure out how to make it work, especially if it end up with me owning a new ginormous pickup truck, a trip out to the woods of the Upper Peninsula, lots of bonfires and weed up in woods, 
and maybe some more hunting and foraging this year. 
Maybe because I’m leaning so much on the 25 lbs of kidney beans and 10 lbs of rice I have at home to make it through my time without owning a truck this winter, 
Or landfilling and maybe storing it until I get a new truck.
and did a quick wash down of the truck at the car wash, noting how bad the frame has gotten. Unpacked things at home, spend a bit of time sitting behind the wheel of Big Red, getting out most of the things I’ll need for winter at home. 
I will move things over once I get my next truck in April. Then I decided to go for a little drive out and up over Cass Hill and Reidsville, then back over through Tan Hollow. 
Saw more burn barrels then I expected, kind of put a smile on my face. That one house I briefly studied on Zillow with the weird lot and neighbors too close has sold. 
Had to think that circa-1800 house I just saw on Zillow in Coeymans must have issues and that’s why the past three sales fell through on it, but also it’s kind of pricey but I do wish now that I could have looked at it lest my truck, but still New York State sucks except for the money, the woods, and the weed. Amazing how priorities change when you reach your mid-40s. Maybe I’m stupid about the truck and the homestead – just buy the 20-year old Honda Civic and plastic house like everybody else in the suburbs – but that shit stinks when you burn it. 
I have so little cheese these days at home as I know it’s junk food but it was good to spend some time together, as I don’t know if this will be our last fondue together as a family. Maybe or maybe not, but much like my truck, time lasts forever until it’s done. I keep going back to how blessed that at least I had a date when I knew Red would be retired. Plus realistically, I know this is the year to travel with my new rig, as I don’t know how long this will be an option in the future. 
