Obsessive Compulsive

I was reading at article I shared earlier  about that firefighter who was laid off because he refused the COVID vaccine because he couldn’t bare the thought of having a foreign fluid injected into his body, much less his years of ever so secretly scrubbing his uniform, washing his body in the sea, and cleaning his car to keep any harm from the chemicals he was exposed to in fighting fires from being tracked into his home. A life of secret rituals, which people had hints about being a bit odd or unusual.

Some how that struck a nerve on me, with my semi-secret trash burning fires, my pyromania, my aversion to landfills and consumerism more generally. While it’s not what it was when I was in my younger years, I do see it as something I really should confront before the day it’s used against me, intentionally or otherwise. As obsessive-compulsive thoughts are kind of silly, and despite the stern warnings of the NYS Health Department and Environmental Conservation Department, a little bit of plastic in a rednecks burn barrel isn’t biggest crime or threat to our world today. Yes, there are hazardous metals and dioxins, but we live in a world of chemical soups.

Indeed, at this point I’ve become more and more open about my pyromania. As I know it’s kind of an open secret, a joke by people that read the blog. It doesn’t pain me nearly as much to throw things away, especially knowing what a joke recycling is. I produce far less trash then most people, I don’t do all the internet buying of junk, and while I have my vices, namely my big pickup truck, the food and supplies I buy is often in bulk and minimally packaged. And quite burnable. I don’t get upset at parties anymore, avoiding paper plates, and I don’t say anything and try not to be too judgemental about other people when it comes to generating a lot of trash and not properly recycling.

Truth is in many more remote parts of country, people burn all kinds of debris from tires on down to bagged household garbage and plastic. I am not arguing it’s not stinky or produces some noxious compounds, but it’s also quite locally accepted. Most off-grid cabins, remote farms, ranches and homes still burn. It’s just what happens in country, and while I might enjoy a good fire and sometimes burn shit I shouldn’t it’s just that. My week-to-week landfill output is almost zero, as I recycle the few cans I use and also clothing and used shoes. I do stockpile some other non-burnables and metals, one of these day’s I’ll get rid of them, but it’s not a lot.

The key to Obsessive – Compulsive disorder might just be to accept things as they are, and I’ve really tried to do that more now. Indeed, without a vehicle, I won’t be able to have my fires, so I’m going to have to use the trash and recycle now more. It’s fine, and maybe it will change my life for the better. And some day, I will have that off-grid cabin and things will be different and nobody will care what I burn up in the woods.