I tossed that little fruit bag of unrecycable in the trash bin along the way in today, not even stopping my bike. Not a lot of trash but I did feel a ping of guilt knowing it’s going to the trash mountain in the Pine Bush. Stuff I probably would have burned if I had a had truck, but I realize it’s kind of silly as most people just have trash pickup and send most of their garbage to the landfill with little thought. Never done that, and I’ve always given pause any time I’ve paid to put garbage into the compactor at the transfer station or even just the trash bin at an event or the office. It’s in some ways kind of silly, as I realize soon enough my old truck will be smashed, it’s interior and gauges shredded, and buried on a similar garbage heap. Just like everything else I own, from my bike to the kayak, my furniture, appliances. Some of scrap metal may be recovered, some of the wood burnt, but most of it’s going on the garbage heap. Seems so trifling to save a wrapper to toss in a fire to keep it from the landfill, when I’m landfilling so many other big things I can’t burn.
I was noticing more garbage dumped along the way – big old garbage sack dumped at Erie Boulevard, another garbage can where somebody had dumped a bag of household garbage in a park can. Not a little bag, a big one. I would never dump garbage that way, but a little plastic bag occassionally probably isn’t the end of world, it’s an interim solution until I get my new truck. It seems like it’s just one garbage heap after another I ride by on my mountain bike. Mountains of garbage tower over our city. My current office is next door and overlooks the old city landfill, I could see two other modern dumping grounds when I worked downtown in Alfred Smith Tower Building. So much about modern society is about buying shit and producing more and more garbage. I say those things while I look at Ford SuperDuty pickups. But I don’t do Amazon or E-commerce and really try to keep my purchases minimal both so I save money and so I have less garbage to get rid of which is more challenging without a garbage landfill pickup subscription. People say I’m a cheap bastard, burning and dumping my crap when I could afford elsewise, but I have a real problem with the orgy of consumerism.
Never liked landfills one bit or the orgry of thoughtless consumerism that goes along with. Once in a rarely while I’ll use a garbage can, and do bring the unburnable cans to the transfer station or my parents bin for recycling. But I’d much rather save stuff for starting and perking up fires, as not only is it fun to burn, then you know what’s going to happen to it, and within 5 minutes of tossing it in a rip-roaring fire it’s gone. Not sitting in landfill for a million years, maybe a bit of a chemical smell depending what I’ve tossed but quickly dispersed into the wilderness.
Too many people subscribe to trash service, they pay a fee, they pack their bin full every week, pretend to be virtuous by washing out their plastic bottles, then watch thoughlessly as the garbage is packed into the garbage truck and hauled off to the nearby dumping grounds. The garbage never crosses their minds after that point. Maybe it’s like that too when I burn it, ignorant of chemicals released into the air and soil, but I also dig through the ashes and pack out anything that doesn’t fully combust. Truth is while their are all kinds of chemicals that make up modern garbage, thanks to industry, the worse offenders have been phased out from most uses, like that ever stinky and toxic polyvinyl chloride and rubber compounds. Polyethylene plastic is hardly nuclear waste or even the chemical soup found in the barrels of Love Canal.
I think too much about trash. It’s maybe because I know about the lies of recycling and consumerism, and that the plastic bag you throw away today is going to end up on the heap on outskirts of town. There is no away. I am aware how toxic and problematic plastics are, but are still superior alternatives to single-use glass and metal that while in theory is more recyclable, often is just used once and landfilled. I know if I buy it, and don’t burn it, I know where it’s going to end up.
That said, I’m also aware of dioxin and furans, the plasticizers and dyes used to make packaging attractive at stores. All things that go up into smoke or into the ashes, washed into the soil and environment all around when you burn it. Really the best option is just to buy less, and buy in bulk. Eat lots of beans, fruits and vegetables that come in minimal plastic. Recycling and recycling labels are mostly a scam, so just assume even if you do put it in a blue bin somewhere, it has a good chance of ending up smashed and on the heap on the outskirts of town. Yes, the ash contains a chemical freak show of chemicals used by industry from chromium to arsenic, but most burnt farm trash pits haven’t caused any problems pushed into the hollows and dumped in the woods once covered with rock and dirt.
When I have my homestead, I’ll continue to burn as much of my trash as possible. But I’ll also try to avoid as much packaging as possible, but inevitably there are feed bags, wrappers, and other discarded materials that come with running a homestead – and just plain living – buying off-farm supplies. I’ll recycle whatever scrap metal I can and avoid buying as much stuff as possible, as money not spent on trash is money you can use elsewhere. And I will get beyond these days without a vehicle, back when I can have nights in wilderness, fires, and do whatever I want. While I despise the burn ban, I do what I do, and I hate landfills and trash more generally even if I do get a good fire for a few minutes as the papers and plastics are converted from trash into carbon dioxide, water vapor and heat – along with those toxic residual chemicals. I’ll keep buying as much minimally packaged foods and supplies as possible, keep using my existing worn out equipment for as long as possible, and just try to avoid making as much trash I can whether it’s landfill or fire bound.
Totally wanted to take the bike path in but I’m afraid it’s still packed with rough sheets of ice, I don‘t worry so much about skiding but I do worry about breaking spokes and other shit on the bike pounding along those two and half miles so I guess it’s Corning’s Hill today.
Probably leave fairly early this morning, ๐ฅถ as I got shit to do in the office today. ๐ข Coffee is a bit weak because I just reheated the growns and remaining coffee with water in the perculator. โ I need more milk, the plastic kind, still haven’t reached out to get delivery yet. I’ve been finding recycling bins on way to toss those bottles, and saving the remaining trash for waste baskets along the way. Just little frozen fruit bags stuffed with other non-recycle plastics. Really try to buy as little packaging as possible, especially now. ๐ฆ It’s not like I’m not getting another truck, so I could save it for springtime fires or hauling to the transfer station, ๐ฅ but whatever – most normal people just use the landfill and subscription services. It’s nice when you’re in woods and have fires every day and shit doesn’t accumulate. I hate throwing away plastic knowing it’s going to sit in the hill in Pine Bush forever. But what about dioxin and furans the liberals say? To think of all that crap I’ve burned down to nothing, those stuffed white and black garbage bags over the years. โป๏ธ Carbon dioxide recycling. When I have homestead out in country, there ain’t going to be much burnable crap leaving the homestead except as smoke.
Maybe that’s the real question that remains in my mind about getting a SuperDuty truck. โฝ It’s all the fucking fuel it’s going to use, and to a lesser extent the cost, though a basic HD truck compared to even modest trim half ton and mid-size truck really isn’t that much more, especially if you get a gasser and it’s not like it’s a daily driver. But what about having a big block engine in the era of climate change? ๐ I don’t know, I hate driving in city, ๐ฆ with all the cops with their erect penises watching me run the yellow or going 3 miles over the speed limit and assholes who don’t know how to drive. I’ll just take the fucking bus. ๐ But buses suck, don’t you know, only loosers, the colored and poor take slow, dirty old bus to work, ๐which they of course keep cutting service to. Yet, I like reading, and not dealing with traffic or bad weather. It’s kind of nice knowing I don’t have to think about clearing the snow off my truck. ๐จ๏ธ That said, I’ve totally fallen in love โฅ๏ธ with those big Fords. And I don’t think I’ll need a lift kit one of those, even though the clearance isn’t that much more over a stock half they do ride a lot higher on road, and I like being able to see God’s scenery, the goats and cows and burn barrels along the roads. ๐ข๏ธ
I keep studying various financial channels and books, and really enjoy that the library now offers free subscriptions to the Wall Street Journal. ๐ฐ While the WSJ isn’t that much different in finanicial coverage then let’s say NPR or NY Times, it’s good to have more perspectives and more info. I used to listen to Marketplace on NPR all the time, not so much now, but I am always looking for insights into investing and saving, and personal growth. ๐ I don’t buy into some of the commercial TV guys like Dave Ramsey or Mad Money, as I think both of them get a lot of things wrong, though they may have some valid points for very poor, though they’re mostly entertainment. Slow and steady, boring in my way. I like simple things that make sense like index funds and bond funds, which have relatively simple fee schedules and track easy to understand indexes, and things like automatic investing. I am intrigued about rolling over IRA contributions to Roth IRAs – while I’ve maxed out both my Roth IRA and 401k/457B over the years – now I want to start moving over parts of the 401k/457B to a Roth – but I’m hoping the market moves down a bit so I have less taxable value when I make the backdoor conversion. ๐ฐ That way, in retirement if I need a new manure spreader, won’t get hit by so much taxes. ๐ฉ Also, I think I am going to work on building up my cash reserves, now that market is up, as I have the big cost of the SuperDuty truck, the camper shell, cell booster for remote work and other equipment for camping before summer gets underway. โจ๏ธ Going to hold off on the diesel heater until autumn but that’s a further cost.
I wish somebody would erect a sign that says, “No ICE on the Bike Path” but right now that would be a lie. The Cherry Avenue Connector is town maintained and cleared, but not the Albany County Rail Trail. I had thought the ice was pretty much gone when I went down to Hannaford yesterday then it rained, but alas it’s still around. I guess it will be Corning’s Hill tomorrow on the bike.
I was going to ride out to the Bender Mellon Farm Preserve ๐๐ but with the ice making for rough riding and not wanting to break a spoke I ended up getting off and heading over Surrey Mall to New Scotland Road to the Pine Hollow Arboretum ๐ชท for a bit of a short walk ๐ถ. Truth is that I didn’t have a lot of free time as I had to shower and meet dad at 11:30. I realized I don’t think I’ve been to Pine Hollow Arboretum since the late autumn, but actually that’s not true as I took the bike path over there a few weeks ago. That had to be December though who knows, the past few weeks and months have been a blur. I feel like I was just camping on the Boreas River a few weeks back.
It was nice to see the folks ๐จโ๐จโ๐ฆ and look at Big Red just sitting up on the hill. ๐ Drives the dog nuts as he is associates the truck wit hme. They’re doing good but each time I see them it’s obvious they are aging, but then so am I. ๐ I don’t think they are necessarily happy I don’t have a vehicle in case of emergencies as only dad still drives. ๐ด๐ป It’s even tougher out in country without a vehicle unlike living tin the city.
After visiting, I rode out to Five Rivers. ๐จ๏ธ It was a nice evening, a good snow squall came through while I was out there and got kind of cold and snowy but it was a good ride out there and I walked around for about an hour. Smoked some grass before heading out there, so I was pretty stoned by the time I got there, probably not great for riding on rural roads, stoned out of my brain, ๐ฎ but the scenery and the cows were amazing as I rode past ๐ฒ in which seemed almost like a dream. But then again, mild, clear winter days often have that look, I was taking in the view of the Heldebergs as Dad drove me out earlier in the day. In many ways not having a truck ๐ is kind of tough, but I need time to think before I repair or replace Big Red. ๐ป I keep talking and researching Ford SuperDuty trucks, and I know ultimately that’s what I will likely get, but I am still unsure and undecided. It would be good though to have a good solid rig to travel a bit more before I settle into the homestead life. Kind of want to see Michigan and Northern Wisconsin not just for the farms, ๐ฎ burn barrels, ๐ข๏ธ or the scenery, ๐๏ธ but to know if that’s the right place to settle to once my job is done in Albany, be it retirement or other situation. There is no guarantees in life,
Honestly, I’m kind of enjoying not having to think about driving or cleaning my truck off in snow, ๐จ๏ธ and it’s fun to find things to do on the bike, get my groceries ๐ on the bike. Been just dropping my trash and recycles off at random bins along the street, I could ask the neighbor, or just smash it down and save it for spring for burning or the transfer station when I get a truck. Did put my food scraps into their compost. Still I loathe any kind of plastic nowadays when I can’t just toss it in the big white bin and turn it into fire. ๐ฅ I just hate buying and throwing away plastic when I know it’s going to a bin and a landfill and not getting burnt. I did my wash when I was at my parents house, ๐ it came out fine, a bit wet. Going forward when they can’t come and get me, I’ll just have to do it before work, probably 6 AM on Monday morning is best with the 30 buses every thirty minutes, then I will have a week’s worth of clean clothes by the time I get home, and at that hour the laundromat is certain to be pretty quiet. ๐ฆ
I saw one of those Cellphone Boosters on a DOT truck ๐ and reminded myself that is something I should get for my new rig. ๐ฑ They’re not cheap but besides being a good safety measure in the wilderness, they’d make it a lot more possible to work remotely from more wilderness areas up at camp ๐๏ธ. I could put off getting the diesel heater until next winter. I do think though a lot about the money ๐ฐ and the cost of this all but also I’m at a point in my life where I don’t have to save every penny ๐ช but I still try to be frugal where I can be. Shit adds up though. That said, maybe a good portion of the summer into the autumn I’ll work remote Friday to Monday in Green Mountains, especially if I have more solar and stoage. Really want to spend a lot of nights in my new rig – not just Michigan but also much of the fall working remote from the Adirondacks, Green Mountains, or Rensselearville anytime I don’t have to be physically in Albany for in-person meetings.
At times I waiver about my trip out to Michigan this summer and the necessary step before then – replacing Big Red. With work, it’s not the best year to take an extended vacation, though late July and August will be slow, and I will have my laptop and can work remotely as needed.
But I also know this is the best year to travel and visit Michigan as I don’t know if it will be the last I can travel. I keep seeing my parents get more frail, I see myself getting grayer and grayer every year. People can and do travel in their later years, but I don’t know if I’ll ever have the chance or get sucked into the homestead life in Westerlo and never really get a chance to get away. Indeed, many retirees travel the globe, but I want the off-grid cabin, not wasting my life visiting tourist traps.
It’s so much money and things to think about replacing Big Red and building the next rig. I make good money, that’s a given, I’ve been quite successful financially and in my career, still it seems like so much cost for a vehicle that will only last for a decade or so, but also I know this is likely my best chance to travel before it’s too late.
I was looking at Big Red today, and some ways regret not getting him welded and keeping him on the road. But he would not have been good to go to Michigan. A nice new truck will provide a reliable ride to Michigan, a truck cap that doesn’t leak, upgraded batteries and solar for camping, and quite possibly adding a cell booster for better service for remote work. I can put off the diesel heater for now, though I do want that for winter camping with the problems I have with my chilled through toes, even with wool socks, camping in an unheated truck cap in winter. Getting old kind of sucks.
Maybe I regret not having a family, or staying too long living in the city, instead focusing on a life based on escape rather reality. Too much focus on the potholers and nights in the wilderness, and not enough on buying a house, having a wife or children. But I never wanted those things, I wanted to spend more time in wilderness. And by replacing Big Red, I have a chance for at least a few more big adventures before it’s too late with hungry goats and hogs to feed.
I really like my freedom and ability to do what I want, without much attachment. Yet, I often feel like it would be nice to have somebody to fall back on, to spend time with. At times I do feel a bit lonely, especially during the winter months when I’m stuck at home.
A times I’ve thought about settling down. But girls are expensive and there is a cost to losing one’s freedom. Much like the homestead, I would miss my weekends in the wilderness and traveling. I get that you don’t have to give everything up to have a girl friend to spend all your time and homeownership doesn’t require owning goats, yet still there is reality and realizing such thing require such dependencies.
Truth is though I love my time in wilderness, riding trail, camping, smoking pot the big trucks, and as much as swear about it, my cold diapolated apartment in suburbs. The idea of having a house to maintain or a practical 20-year old Honda Civic to drive to the suburban office complex just rubs me the wrong way. Though I’m well aware these days can’t last forever, and I’m getting old.
The truth is a one legged stool is awful wobbly, as much as I like those days in wilderness, it’s hard to not have anyone really to fall back on. And my apartment is such a dump, and the city buses are dirty and slow. Most people find it hard to believe that at my point in the career I’m still living in same dumpy old apartment I rented when I first graduated college, and still biking or busing it to work every day, even though my office is far from downtown and an easy commute. But my true love still remains the wilderness.