I was reading one of those endless ads about serious depression and they said one of the symptoms of depression is hopelessness. Like so many words Iβve heard, I have a common sense view of what that word means but no real understanding of the meaning. So I thought Iβd ask Meta AI to give me a description.
βHopelessness is a feeling of despair, helplessness, and pessimism about the future. Itβs a state of mind where someone feels that their situation is impossible to change or improve, and that they are trapped with no way out.
When someone feels hopeless, they may:
1. Feel a lack of control over their life or circumstances. 2. Believe that their problems are insurmountable or unsolvable. 3. Feel disconnected from others, like no one understands or cares. 4. Experience a sense of numbness, emptiness, or emotional pain. 5. Have difficulty imagining a positive future or finding motivation to make changes.
Hopelessness can be triggered by various factors, such as:
β Traumatic events or experiences β Chronic stress, anxiety, or depression β Major life changes or losses (e.g., job loss, divorce, death of a loved one) β Feeling trapped in a situation or relationship β Lack of social support or connection
Itβs essential to recognize that hopelessness is a treatable condition. If you or someone you know is struggling with hopelessness, itβs crucial to seek help from a mental health professional, a trusted friend or family member, or a support group.β
With that definition out of the way, the next question in my mind is do I feel hopeless? In some ways yes, as in the short term I donβt see a lot of options besides saving and investing so I can retire early and build that off grid homestead out in the real wilderness. Yet itβs not an immediate dream β still nearly thirteen years away β but I save and invest every week and Iβm constantly reading and learning.
I still feel in many ways trapped, stuck in New York State in my cold and miserable apartment. I do spend as many of my weekends as possible in the wilderness β state and national forest back country β yet itβs not the same and itβs now. And maybe itβs just a delusional dream not because of a lack of money or will power but because it doesnβt really exist. I mean Iβve seen a few both on YouTube and in person, toured that one back in college, yet all I ever see when I get another Zillow alert is another hideous suburban property covered with vinyl siding.
Everybody I know is buying that suburban house covered in plastic and saving itβs a good investment. Donβt you know homes appreciate in value. Renting is just pissing away money, but you need a place to live. But then I see the endless ads for plastic windows, roofersand gutters β not to mention kitchen remodels and new showers. As if I wanted to live in a place under constant construction with an enormous dumpster out back. It just seems like the typical suburban house is about buying more shit and ripping out and throwing away the old to the local dumping grounds across the river. Stock market is certain to be in the crapper at least for the next few years.
I think Iβm playing the long game. But many say Iβm playing no game at all. Itβs all in my mind, itβs my mental illness speaking louder then reality. Youβll never escape New York State, youβll work to your advanced age, stuck in that rundown apartment in Delmar, riding the city bus or taking your mountain bike to work every day. Year after year. Youβll be poor forever, as you pay one rent payment month after month as your building continues to rot away.
Yet, why settle for less when you can work hard, save and invest as much as possible, and build the off-grid homestead you really want with money youβve saved and invested. Truth is if you buy land remote enough and build a simple enough structure it can be done. Equipment is expensive but money grows over time and you can acquire over time. Or rent for one time use. There are options besides the standard suburban home, whether itβs in a neighborhood that smells like cow shit or elsewise.