Few things at this point take my breath away like reading he died at age 64, right before retirement … ⚰️

I don’t know why I think that so scary but as I push further into my forties, dying in my mid 60s just prior to retirement seems so scary. Maybe because I’m working so hard and saving so much for my retirement but also because my fear that a life that exists in my imagination might never exist and that I’m forever stuck in Albany, the same drudgery of taking the bus downtown to the big office building downtown in the big city. A future dreamed about and saved for but never reached and only forgotten about.

While tomorrow is never guaranteed, somehow dying in your sixties before retirement or much of it seems like such a cruel thing. All the decades of work for no reward. The whole thing just really horrifies me each time I see it brought up in the news.