Life

Why am I still in New York ?

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I told myself quite sometime ago, I was going to leave Albany and New York State behind for greener pastures. I wanted to go somewhere the winters aren’t so harsh and didn’t have so much road-salt, where the laws and government aren’t so overbearing, where the taxes were low. I wanted to move to a rural community, where I could have fires and burn anything I wanted to, make a lot of noise, own any guns I so desired to buy and shoot. Hunt, fish, trap, camp, and live off-the-grid. Have a hobby farm, have chickens, goats, pigs, cows, or any other animal that makes delicious meat to eat.

Santanoni Mountains

I live in the suburbs of Delmar and take the bus to work at my job downtown, wearing a suit, because it’s easy, cheap, and my job pays well despite the long hours and the stress. It’s not for passion or because I think I can change anything in New York. I’ve kind of given up on having much of an opinion or working for change, as even if I didn’t have to worry about the potential conflict with work, I think I would feel fustrated about the lack of success at what I’m doing. I’m just happy making the system work as it does, and taking home a good paycheck every two weeks.

Stack of Wood

But beyond that, I don’t really have a plan, beyond where I’m stuck in New York. I like the countryside and spending time in the woods. But I’m hardly a skilled hunter, sportsmen, much less a farmer. I have some money, but no land of my own. But beyond that, I really have no idea how to relocate to another part of the country, especially if I have no connections out there, and really don’t know much about an area besides what I kind find on the Internet. Finding a job when you no nobody from another part of the life, much less traveling across the country for a job interview thats less then certain, is a heavy lift to say the least.

Meanders

Weekends camping in the wilderness and road trips into the countryside keep me sane. I may just be struck in a system and in a place that I’m not crazy about, but getting away for a couple of days, seems to pacify me. I like the money and the toys. But some point, I really need to make a decision on moving forward beyond Albany.

Money, toys, and the many great wild lands keeps me in this sometimes oppressive state. But more than that, I really don't have the skills yet to live the life I so desire. So I'm stuck in the suburbs with jacked up truck.

As I’ve Gotten Older I’ve Written Fewer Words

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When I was 21 years of age, I used to be a prolific blogger. I used to write all of the time, almost doing a post every day, about a different topic. For a while I had a theme for each day of week, later things kind of fell into reruns, with less frequent posts. Eventually, blog posts and essays became an occasional part of the blog – not something I wrote on every day.

Untitled [Expires June 23 2024]

When I was 21, I felt I had unique experiences and unique views that ought to be expressed. Indeed, many of them have been expressed on this blog. But now that I am 30, I am more interested in what other folks have to say, and sharing what they share. Sometimes it better to listen, and if somebody hits something right on the nose, to share their content, rather then right my own. Not all works have to be creative – and indeed, many know better then I know.

Beginning of Hinkley Reservior

Many life stories I haven’t chosen to share. Sometimes, I am just not willing to share my mistakes, lest play up the embarrassment of the story. Other times, I can’t share on promise to others to keep what I know in the back of head, and not public knowledge. And in many cases, I plain lack the words to write them down.

Bachelors Degrees Are a Wealthy Suburban Thing

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If you ask many people today, the assumption would be almost everybody has a Bachelors Degree, if not more education then that. Yet, except in the most suburban (and wealthy) portions of state, Bachelors Degrees are relatively uncommon — often held by fewer then 1 in 10 people over 25 years of age.

Fascinating book to thumb through

It turns out there is a close connection between suburban lifestyles and having a bachelors degree. Zoomed into closer into a map of the Capital District, you will note how closely link suburbanization is to number of people with a bachelors degree.

Engine Run

That said, obtaining that Bachelors Degree might be worth your while — if you avoid college debts, and land a good job after college. Indeed, the wealthiest portions of state tend to have the highest percentage of those with Bachelors Degree, e.g. the suburbs.

Got 18650 battery charger and batteries

It’s probably wrong to assume one is wealthy or well off with a Bachelors Degree, or that all rural folks are backwards hicks leaving in poverty. It’s more that the more affluent (in money terms) suburban life tends to require more schooling then more rural or urban occupations.

Always Stuck in the Present

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One thing that\’s always bothered me a bit is that no matter how hard one tries, we are always stuck in the present. The present is forever lasting, we can not travel back in time or into the future. We can see cause and effect, and realize there is something called time but never really experience it or control it, because there is no time but the present.

Driving home the other night, I realized how strange time really is. I was 5 minutes from home, and I was so tired. Yet, I felt I could be driving forever, as there was no escaping the present, no matter how hard I tried. I knew I would be home in 5 minutes, but that didn\’t mean I was home. I could have been driving forever.

Moontree

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There is that funny thing called the future and the past. We remember the past, and can often forsee future events. Certainly if I had decided to doze off or take my hands off the steering wheel, I could perdict what would like happen. If I crashed, I probably could remember back to what happened on the sleepy night, but there would be no turning back the car from crashing.

The relationship of present to the past and future is often pretty clear in our minds. Yet, it seems strange when you really think about those other times, when you know there is nothing but the present, a time that will stretch on for enternity. We will never escape the present.