I looked at the setting sun over the Helderbergs, I smelled the light aroma of dairy cattle…

I always liked the hilltowns and the mountains, the remote country. The wild and free world I grew up in what now seems like years ago, now seems so distant but is coming closer, day by day as I continue to save and invest one paycheck at a time.

I frequently find myself looking at the Land and Farm website, realizing that my dream is no longer impossible or even that far away. But at the same time I’m not fully there and I need my job in the city and my low cost apartment to support it to get closer to my goals. But I see the mountains across the hay field and I can hear the cows and smell the sweet smell of silage and I know my future isn’t impossibly far away.

I know someday soon I’ll be in a place again where I can live out in the country and have that off grid hobby farm out west that I’ve always wanted but for now my focus must be on getting results at work, investing in my future, improving my mental health and well-being and taking the steps I need to take to get to a better tomorrow. I see the risks in the short term but I’m listening to the advice of what I learn each session with my therapist and I am really focused on the long term goals and what are the most probalistic outcomes as I head there step by step.